Choose no regret

Welcome to This Daring Adventure podcast where we work on bridging the gap between where we are and where we want to be in order to live a bigger and bolder life. In this podcast, we will provide inspiration, tips, and skills you need to make your life the adventure you want it to be. Here's your host, mindset mentor, and life coach, Tri

Hey everybody. Welcome back to This Daring Adventure. Can you believe we're already in September? No. luckily the weather is amazing, so that's always enjoyable. I wanted to just remind you, in case you haven't taken a look yet, my new coaching membership you redefined is now open. Super excited about this. I have been busy creating bite-sized videos, worksheets, meditations, all the good stuff, all the very best material, all the tools and skills that you need. To get unstuck for Good are in that membership. In addition, I'm going to be doing group coaching sessions in the coming months, and I am also doing a monthly topic for September. We're looking at living your purpose, so we'll be doing a bit of a deep dive. Into that topic in case you're interested. And when you join, now you are a founding member. So you lock in the price of $19 a month, which is a phenomenal bargain. Phenomenal. And that price will stay $19 no matter how much it's raised and it will be raised. And I'm also offering a free bonus. Which is a 20 minute coaching session with me for the month each month. So join up now. You're a founding member at $19 a month. You get all the very best tools and skills to help you get unstuck and create whatever it is you want. You get a free 20 minute coaching session with me each month and all the other resources that are available in there. I have my future self meditation. Which I love, which all my clients have loved, and some tapping sessions, and I'm continuing every day to be creating material and uploading it onto the platform. So I would love to see you there. You can try it free for seven days and then after that it's $19 a month, so you really have no excuse. Not to join us. I think it's amazing. It's a phenomenal deal, and I'm super excited to be sharing all of this material. You'll learn so much, we will apply it directly to your life and it changes everything. So get in there and I will see you there. Alright, so today's episode is Choose No Regret. I discovered I have not done an episode on Regret yet, and I wanted to cover that topic. I did have a conversation with a client the other day about regret, which inspired this episode. So basically what I wanted to talk about was. What if regret doesn't come from the decisions we make, but how we relate to them, right? How we think about them. Let's start with a little story. Imagine you've spent weeks, maybe even months, agonizing over a huge decision. Maybe it's moving to a new city or. Choosing a different career, buying a house or car, something big. And sure there's the practical stuff, weather, traffic, payment plans, but underneath it all, there's this fear, right? What if I choose wrong? What if I regret it? What if I get stuck? And that line of questioning can really paralyze you. Then you make the move, you make the decision. Suddenly you're battling regret anyway. You're asking yourself, did I pick the right one or what if I'd stayed? And you can find yourself beating yourself up, second guessing and spiraling with a snap of your fingers. And that's where our coaching exchange comes in. The voice says if I make the best decision, I won't have regret, I won't second guess, and I'll feel good. But another part of you knows that's not how it works. Regret isn't the problem. It's how we relate to regret. It's how we think about it, and that's the battleground. So when we indulge in regret and we live our lives spinning out. Here's what I've noticed. First of all, it robs your present regret puts you into a loop of should've, could've, would've, and that's not living. It feels terrible. It's just replaying the past and punishing yourself for decisions that are in the past. Second, it fuels avoidance. You avoid making more decisions because you're so afraid of feeling that pain again. So you stay stuck. You don't wanna make another, in quotes, mistake. So you stop exploring, trying, moving forward. Third, it steals your self trust. Every time you regret a choice, you chip away at your trust in yourself, and then the next decision feels even more terrifying because you feel unsteady in your own footing. You really don't have your own back. And regret is an indulgent emotion. It's not useful, it's not helpful, and it's something that often keeps us stuck in rumination instead of growth. There's no movement forward. There's no evolvement. But listen, regret itself isn't the enemy. It's your relationship to it. It truly is the way you think about it. That's the issue. So regrets will limit us to past thinking. And when you are stuck in a constant loop of defining yourself from the past, telling yourself, I always mess up decisions. I always feel regret. I can't trust myself. I can't make a good decision when we live there. Our identity becomes small, predefined, and stuck. There's nothing good that comes out of it. It does not help us to move forward and we do not evolve. So here's the game changer. We want to remodel regret. Instead of it being a verdict, we want to change what it means. And the real solution is a decision to never regret a decision. Did you get that? Decide to never regret a decision. Decide that you are the one who gets to make that decision. Great, no matter what. It's your choice. So you make a choice. You commit to not regretting it and instead of just hoping for the right outcome, you say, both paths can be amazing because I will make them. So you get to choose. You become your own ally. You have your own back. You stop blaming the decision or yourself. There's no blame. This is a powerful shift, and regret is an emotion. It's a decision, and it's not helpful. It's in fact one of the least useful emotions, but you have the power to choose how to transform it and how to stop letting it keep you stuck. So let's lay out the key lessons here first. Your thoughts always create your feelings. Your feelings create your actions, and your actions will create your results. So if you're regretting, it's because of how you're thinking about your decision now, not the decision itself. Second regret is always optional, not automatic. Not a given and not something that just happens. You're not doomed to regret. You can choose a thought like, I'm never going to regret this. I've made the decision. I commit to it. That's it. So often people have the impression that they don't have any power over whether they regret something or not, but they always do. And you are the one who makes the decision. Great. From here you decide you support yourself, you take action. There's no decision that is inherently right or wrong, good or bad. It's only what you do with it after that counts and by do with it, I mean what you think about it. Fourth, you want to define yourself by your future, not your past. So stop identifying as the person who regrets. Instead, you wanna identify as a person who supports their own decisions and moves forward. Identify as a person who has her own back. Okay, so now let's make this really practical for you and how your life will look different if you do this first. When you decide something, it doesn't matter if it's big or small, before overthinking it, say and think. I commit to not regretting whatever choice I make. Say it out loud, write it down, put it on a sticky note. Carry it with you. Decide you are not regretting your choice. Okay. Second catch. Regret in the moment, you need to be aware and notice these thoughts as they come up. So if you're thinking I shouldn't have moved or I made the wrong choice, then you want to coach yourself. You wanna catch yourself, you wanna refocus your brain, right? Oh, regret, I see you and I don't have to go there. You can journal or say, I made this decision and here's how I'm gonna make it amazing. It totally reframes your energy towards action and not remorse, not indulging in regret, and then pick a recent choice you're regarding in small or big ways. Maybe it was a move or a job or even a decision to have a meal, a particular meal. Ask yourself. What could it look like if I didn't let that decision define me? What could I create instead? And then start taking forward focus action from that thought. So as we wrap up here, remember, regret doesn't define your life. How you think about regret does. You are the creator. Decide to have your own back, make any choice into something you can support, and soon you won't be just the person who chooses, well, you'll be the person who chooses bravely and then makes anything she chooses truly work. Think about the power you have there. Okay. And hey, before you go, can I ask you for a quick favor? If this episode spoke to you, would you take just a moment to rate, review and subscribe to the podcast? It may seem like a small thing, but it's actually a huge help. It's how more women, women who are feeling stuck, women who are struggling with regret will be able to find this show and you are. And your review can literally help someone else start their own daring adventure. So thank you so much for doing that. I read every single review and it means the world to me. Thank you for being here, and until next week, have a great week and go choose boldly and no regrets. See you next time.